Mind Your Own Business

1 Thessalonians 4:11-12

to aspire to live quietly, to mind your own affairs, and to work with your hands, as we directed you, so that you may behave properly toward outsiders and be dependent on no one.

Our yard has been the site of some dramatic battles between the birds who call it home. One year we had a mob of crows battling a single stubborn owl over a nest she had stolen from them. Another year a mother robin and I worked together to save her babies from a house wren that kept throwing them out of her nest. Several hawks have considered our bird feeder bait, hiding in the bushes under our window to make easy prey of the songbirds who visit, widowing several mourning doves. And one epic afternoon we had a large tree fill up with crows while the neighboring tree filled with turkey vultures, in what I could only imagine was a Jets and Sharks kind of moment.

But this year we have a different kind of bird battle going on. This one is between two male cardinals, and it has been going on for weeks. These two proud birds are battling for territory. Front yard, side yard, back yard…they regularly harass each other. Territorial behavior is common amongst birds during early spring, but this particular battle has a twist—the battle is entirely one-sided. You see, only one of the birds actually exists. This one bird is so intent on finding trouble that he finds it in every window around our house; and, this morning, he even discovered trouble in the sideview mirror of our car. Yes, he is battling his own reflection. And he is persistent.

How often do we act like this cardinal? How often are our annoyances and upsets with people or situations triggered because we see ourselves reflected in them? We see traits that we either don’t like in ourselves, triggering self-loathing; or we see traits we fear we are lacking, triggering feelings of insecurity or failure. We think we are battling with something or someone external, but we really battle with ourselves.

And how often do we complicate our lives by looking around for trouble—for something to worry about or something to trigger the self-righteous anger that seems to fuel our society these days? We are glued to news that capitalizes on these instincts, we listen to podcasts that confirm our fears, we keep our territorial hackles permanently engaged looking for threats in places where they sometimes don’t exist.

I wish I could impart the wisdom of 1 Thessalonians 4:9-12 to our beleaguered cardinal friend.  “Love those around you and aspire to live quietly, mind your own business, build that nest as you have been directed, so that you may behave properly to outsiders and be dependent on no one.” Yes, sometimes life does present us with real and immediate issues with which we must engage; but sometimes the issues we engage with are of our own making or just not our business.  The next time you feel yourself battling or getting upset with people or situations around you, remember the cardinal, and ask God to help you see if you are the actual source of your current stressor. Use the guidance Paul gave the Thessalonians to simplify your life by staying on the path that reflects God’s image instead of your own.

In The Wilderness

Wilderness-what does this word bring to mind for you? According to Merriam-Webster, one of the meanings of wilderness is  “an empty or pathless area or region”. When taken literally, we may imagine the areas around us that are wooded, barren, or otherwise not scarred or inhabited by humans. We could also imagine an area of quiet and solitude even within our homes that is devoid of noise, digital distractions, thoughts of all we have to do, or the many other ways we fill our mind and environment with near-constant stimuli. I find my best reflection and moments of mental “wilderness” occur when I’m outside and away from the barrage.

In looking to the Bible and the life of Jesus, we may recall that Jesus has times when his work is done in busy urban settings, while also recalling the times when he’s in natural settings-bodies of water, mountaintops, and wilderness. Some of his most important moments occur outside.

The Bible contains many references to Jesus going outside to pray and reflect, sometimes alone, sometimes with others.

Mark 1:12-13: At once the Spirit sent him out into the desert, and he was in the desert forty days, being tempted by Satan. He was with the wild animals, and angels attended him. 

While this particular event sounds difficult, can you imagine that Jesus emerged after the 40 days the same? 

With the coming of Spring and as we move through Lent, consider challenging yourself by taking some time in the wilderness (or as close as you can get to it) to empty your mind of the everyday and to make space for the transformations that this time can bring about. Consider what Jesus might have contemplated during his times alone outside. Reflect on the ways God may be transforming you.

O God, you have called us to ventures of which we cannot see the ending, by paths yet untrodden, through perils unknown.Give us faith to go out with courage, not knowing where we go, but only that your hand is leading us and your love supporting us through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

Stephanie Smith-Cooney

What I learned from Poppi

A couple of weeks ago, Laurie and I returned from vacation.  Vacation, for us, and probably for everyone, means different things at different stages in life.  Like many young folk with children, vacation for us means driving... and lots of it!  We drove to Virginia and stopped for the night on the long car ride to Pennsylvania.  We visited Maryland and got to see Laurie's parents new Bed and Breakfast.  We went to the Baltimore aquarium and visited some of our best friends Ben and Rachel Israel.  We got to see some family: Laurie's home clan, my grandmother, and Carl and Carol.  We also got to see someone for the last time: Laurie's Poppi.  We visited Laurie's great grand parents in Conneticut, her Nonni and Poppi, and had a wonderful time.  Over the past couple of years, Poppi survived a few different forms of cancer and when we were up he had just been told he was ok from the latest bought.  He didn't look like he used to... he'd lost some weight and a little bit of energy.  But, when they saw us and when they saw Charlotte, you could tell that there was just so much life left in him.  He'd only met Charlotte once before, and she was a bit of a priss and that point... she would not let anyone hold her!  But this time around, Poppi took her in his arms and she rested her head on his shoulder.  It was just about the only thing that Nonni and Poppi could talk about the whole time we were there.   When we getting ready to leave, Laurie said to her mom and I, "I really don't want to go."  We made plans for them to come and visit on Christmas, and said our goodbyes.  On Thursday, we were all heading to a Presbytery meeting, and Laurie got a phone call.  Poppi was very sick, again.  Half an hour later, while the Presbytery meeting was in session, Laurie was standing on the front porch of the Church saying her final goodbyes to her Poppi.  We don't know if Poppi heard Laurie telling her how much she loved him or Charlotte's laughs right in the midst of the moment.  But God heard, and God met us there.  

I've only known Poppi for a little while.  I came to visit on Christmas the first year Laurie and I were dating, and he and Nonni made sure to buy me a gift, a silver cross pen, because they wanted to make us feel at home.  Nonni and Poppi have always wanted nothing more than to make you feel like you were part of the family.  They always made more food than anyone could eat (they're 100% italian after all!) and they always had more room at the table.  When Laurie's mom was growing up, she talks about how there were always, ALWAYS people in the house, laughing, joking, and eating.  When we were up, Poppi had made a new friend who he was letting do some choirs around the house because he could not find work.  He came over, and Poppi bought Charlotte right up to him... it was like he was a part of the family.  

There's something sacred, and I think something we can really learn from, in a life like that.  Family has always been a struggle for me.  My mother died when I was one, and I never knew my father.  I was raised by my grandmother... but something i've always wanted was a place to belong.  I'm the kid who never really fit in, who never really felt like he had a home.  But yet, somehow, God has always provided.  God has given me amazing friends... friends who I would not hesitate to call sister or brother.  God gave me Carl and his wife Carol, who has always been more than just a pastor to me: he's like my father.  God gave me Laurie's family, who has shown me such amazing grace and love.  God has shown me grace through Poppi: you might not always feel like you have a place to belong... but when a Giordano is around you know you're at home.

There's a passage in the Bible that Presbyterians love, it's found in Ephesians 1:4-5.  It says, "In love, God Predestined us for adoption to sonship, through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will."  The word "predestined" is a combination of the words "pro," which means "before," and "horitzo," which is where we get "horizon."  In this passage, predestine literally means "before the horizon."  A horizon is a type of a gap, or a beginning point, or a point in time.  This word is used to describe the "adoption" of the children of God as "sons."  I say sons, and not sons and daughters, not because women are not included in this idea, but because the word son carries theological connotation in ancient Israel.  Sons were worthy of a father's inheritance... a son was the highest position one could hold in the family.  What this passage is saying is that, before the dawn of our lives, God's love for us was always there, and has always been offering us the gift of being his blessed children.  

A lot of Christians I've met, especially a lot of pastors, have had some pretty big struggles in their family lives.  I think a lot of people in the Church have experienced the same feelings I have felt of not feeling like we really had a place to belong.  But, in Christ, there is a place for us.  We are called sons and daughters of God from the very beginning... God's love is there for us even before we were born.  What if... what if we realized that the context was love?  It's easy for us to say in our minds... God can't love, there's so much crap that happens in the world.  But believing in the love of God is subversive... it's under the surface.  Sometimes it feels like a hope against all hope, but if it's truly there... it means everything.  Love, grace, healing, and redemption can shatter our very foundations.  It can transform our entire being.  

Think about this: God calls us sons, daughters, brothers, and sisters.  He welcomes us all into his home.  People like Poppi, in some small way, they get what the Church is.  They might not even know that they get it, they might not even realize that they get it.  But sometimes they get it more than the people who can put words to it.  Being a child of God isn't about understanding a theological proof... it's about being in the midst of God's family.  It's about being welcome, being whole, and being healed.  It's about eating and laughing and loving.  It's about being real, carnal, humans with one another who love and hurt and lie and forgive and heal.  It's about living in a space where we acknowledge that we're not perfect, but that there is grace.  

Poppi's life makes me want to live.  It makes me not want to be selfish... to give and show love to people.  It makes me want to forget about the things that hold me back... and strive forward to what is ahead.  It makes me want to pull people alongside, and show them how deep the well of grace really is.

Reflections on my first year as a pastor

This coming Sunday will mark one year since I was called to be pastor of Lavonia Presbyterian Church.  A year ago, I was just graduating seminary.  Laurie was pregnant and was finishing up her job at the Pittsburgh Presbytery.  We were moving to the south for the first time… in fact in was our first time living outside of Pennsylvania.  It’s been challenging trying to learn so much at much: what does it mean to be a pastor?  What does it mean to be a father?  What does it mean to be a husband in this context?  What does it mean to be Presbyterian in the south?  All these questions are still circling around in my mind all the time.

I think things are going relatively well on most fronts.  Charlotte has changed me in ways I had never imagined… but it’s so incredible watching her grow and experience life!  Laurie is adjusting… even though I think she misses her family.  We’re making friends and growing into the people who we were meant to be.  Our relationship with the Church is great.  We love the people there… they are supportive and generous, giving and hopeful.  We’ve started some fun new programs, we’ve challenged everyone with new kinds of music and activities, we’ve gotten to have an impact on people’s lives!  I feel like I can really see God moving in this place… there’s a spirit of hope that’s really coming alive.

I still struggle though.  I struggle, firstly, because of who I am as a person.  I have expectations, hopes, and dreams that don’t always match up with reality!  There are a lot of things that I want in my own life that I realize I just can’t have.  I struggle because I’m a human being, with my own unique strengths and flaws, and I often feel like I wish I could be someone I’m not or do things I’m built to do.  In my relationship with my wife, often I can be highly pessimistic and Laurie is almost optimistic to a fault!  I struggle with myself.  I struggle with my denomination.  There’s so much fighting and tension going on right now… I don’t know what’s going to happen.  It seems worse than it’s ever been.   I sometimes feel that what the Church really needs right now is young people with skills… skills that are much deeper than mine. 

Yet, even with all of this, I’m proud of who I am.  I’m proud because I believe that God has called me to be proud… that he’s spoken grace into my life and forgiven all my faults.  He’s created a community for me to live and grow into, where I don’t have to be everything to everyone.  He’s created grace so that we can be broken together.  He’s bonded the Church together, so that even when I feel like I’ve fallen flat on my face, God is there and God is bigger.  I think in the end, what the Church, and probably all of the world, needs right now is a faithful, humble, enduring hope.  We need hope, because always need to remember to look to what is to come.  Hope needs to have faith in God and in one another.  It needs to be humble, putting one another before ourselves.  Most of all, hope must endure all of the difficulties that we encounter.

My prayer is that we would be a people of hope.  No matter what our circumstance, context, or situation… may we be a people of hope.  

Some thoughts on Evangelism...

Someone I know was having a conversation recently with a gentleman who was actively sharing the Gospel in his community.  My friend had been taught how to share the Gospel from doing work with Campus Crusade.  While I have personally moved some distance away from certain aspects of Cru.’s methodology, I still hold a lot of respect for the movement and it’s awareness that people need to hear the life-giving message of Jesus Christ.  I also think that Bill Bright got something right when composing the four laws: the first law is “God loves you and created you to know him personally” (it used to be… “and has a wonderful plan for your life,” but that was later changed after the realization that the call to discipleship is not always a call to a “wonderful life” but it is always a call to a life giving relationship with God.)  I like the first for many of the same reasons that I identify with the “reformed” tribe of theology: it starts with God.  The Bible does the same thing… it begins in Genesis 1 with a creative God forming, shaping, and lovingly crafting humanity into his own image.  The second law goes on to say that there is a problem: sin has entered the world… and the third law says that Jesus came to save the world.  But before we speak about sin or redemption, we speak of the love of God.  The context is love… we don’t speak to someone of their problems and difficulties unless they realize that you care for them.  The context is also that God has created humanity with a purpose… your life means something.  I do believe that God has a wonderful plan for our lives: that we would worship God and enjoy him forever.  I think we do that through our lives.

So as my friend was dialoguing with this individual who was sharing his faith, she expressed all of these things to him.  He said that he “respectfully disagreed.”  Instead, he asked, “if you were in a building in 911 and you knew your lives were going to end… how would you share the Gospel?”  Obviously, (for him) the answer would be to call them to repent so they would be saved from hell!  I (also) respectfully disagree.

For me, the question is… “what is evangelism?”  If we are people who are called by Christ into the labor of Matthew 28, to invite people into relationship with Christ… what exactly are we doing.  I have a fundamental disagreement with this second, common, approach because of some key assumptions that it makes about life in general.  If the whole idea of evangelism is to announce that we’re saved from hell so we can go to heaven… what happens to our lives right now?  This might be controversial to some, but I’m not really that big on the classical conception of heaven and hell.  The Bible used different language for what happens after death: resurrection.  Resurrection involves our bodies, it’s carnal in nature.  In scripture, you don’t find many references to a disembodied existence. 

So what is evangelism?  In my opinion, it’s inviting people to a new way of life.  It’s joining people for coffee and conversation, it’s sharing lives and hearts together.  It’s calling people to join in community together.  It’s saying… I want you to come and see what this new life is like.  Ultimately, it’s showing people what it’s like to really be human.  It’s saying… look, Jesus calls us to live this way, and it’s so much better than anything else I’ve experienced.  It fills my soul with worshipping God, it meets my human needs of relationship, and it gives me a calling… to live my life to God in union with his spirit and experience and share true, holy joy.  Now, in the OT perception of death… you walk with God… and then you keep walking. In the NT Jesus speaks of heaven coming down to this world.  We don’t need to go to heaven, heaven comes here. What happens in DEATH is very closely related to what happens in life.  You’ll still have a body… you’ll still be doing the same types of things you do in this world… because you’re not whisked off to a different place!  You’re resurrected!

Over the past year or so… I’ve been trying to develop what I call a “carnal” theology.  People often think of carnality strickly in relation to sin (don’t drink, smoke, swear or chew, and don’t you hang out with the girls that do!)  But… what if we started our theology not with sin, but with the image of God.  What if we thought of the body not as bad, but as created good and whole… even though life is tainted with brokenness.  The Gospel, in my opinion, is not about escaping our bodies but living our lives to the fullest.  It’s about using our talents to the glory of God.  It’s not about getting out of here, but bringing heaven here… each and every day we have the chance to witness to the wonders of God in the way that we live our lives.  

Missional Theology

Today, we talked about missional theology.  "Missional" is a word that's been thrown around a lot these days that just means, basically, "the church should do stuff."  Honestly, we're having the same conversations I was having in Cru in college on a different level, so I feel right at home.  I'm not really a "Church guy."  What I mean by that is, I wasn't raised in the Church.  I don't have any sort of life long relationship with the Church that brings me nostalgic memories.  It might be weird to say all this because I'm a pastor, but it's the truth.  I've been working within the system and have been coming to appreciate everything much more, but I think my heart will always be somewhere else. 

What brought me into the Church, and still remains my deepest inspiration, is to see how deeply we can be effected by relationship.  Most of you know my story: my mom died when I was one.  She was only 17 when I was born, I never knew my mom or dad.  I didn't have much of a family except for my grandmother.  I met my pastor when I was 17 and that relationship turned my life inside out.  He invited me into his life... he fed me dinner, he took me on car trips, he let me mow his lawn.  I also had lots of other great friends and relationships along the way, with people like my friends from High School, Ben and Melanie, who really helped make me feel like I had a family.  I graduated from High School and went to college and seminary.

What's really inspired me the whole way along is a faith that is relational.  A relational faith touches people in the deepest parts of our souls. 

Missiologist Alan Hirsch uses the term "communitas" to describe what happens in a true missional community.  If you want to think about how communitas works, think of a football game.  The fans in the stand are a community.  They have shared beliefs and gestures and experiences together.  But on a deeper level, there is no commitment.  Yet, if you look at the players on the field, they have communitas.  They are deeply commited, every hour of of every day.  Even in the "off season."  The fans, the community, get excited about what the team is doing, but for the team it's just their lives: it's what they do. 

It reminds me of the story of the chicken and the pig.  They walk past a sign that asks them to volunteer for a ham and eggs breakfast.  The chicken volunteers, but the pig... he's all in!  It's giving some vs. giving all. 

I think sometimes in the Church we become too engaged with protecting and sustaining the community and it's shared values instead of living into a faithful communitas.  We worry about how things look or will appear, and not how our faith is lived out.  What excites me is seeing felt needs being met, seeing lives changed, and seeing people totally transformed. 

If theres one thing I know about Jesus from reading scripture, it's that he messes people up.  He tells people to give away their money, to love the unloveable, and even to forgive enemies!  Jesus messes with our worldview.  He asks for the whole life commitment... to understand that what we have is not our own.

I pray that Churches would be places where lives could be changed.  Places where we welcome the sick, the lame, and the immoral.  I want to see broken people in the Church... I want to see people who have no where else to go have a place where they can call their home.

The Church does not need more programs.  It does not need bigger buildings for more money.  What it needs is commitment to the vision of Jesus Christ.  If we really want to be a missional Church, what we need to realize is that we need to give everything.

At our Church, we're getting ready to join a program called Acts 16:5.  Laurie and I are both really excited about it.  What it does, really, is call the whole Church together and asks "how do we do this?"  Pray for us.
I'm thankful for God's grace for me in this area.  I pray that he would use me to reach out to the hurting and wounded places, so that his message of grace could be heard.

Wee Kirk

After Church today, Laurie, Charlotte and I got together and headed out for the PC(USA) “Wee Kirk” conference, put on by Presbyterians for Renewal.  Wee Kirk means Small Church, and the conference brings together pastors from Churches of 100 members or less.  The conference is being held in Montreat NC, and it’s just such a beautiful, wonderful place. 

Right now, I don’t have too many expectations for the week, other than the fact that I hope to become more aware of God’s presence and more in tune with his spirit so that I can better minister to the wonderful people of our Church and the people of the town.  I’m so new at this whole thing, that I just hope God will teach me some ways that I can better minister to and serve.

Today was kind of a hectic day.  It was a Sunday, and Sundays are always hectic for me.  I’m not the most organized person in the world, and sometimes I feel like it’s hard for me to even keep my head on straight on Sunday Mornings.  But there is always something special about Sundays for me.  Today, I looked at the alarm, and praised God for the opportunity to worship him.  I spent some time getting ready, and rejoiced in one of the benefits of a small Church: being able to pray for each of your members. 

At Church, people were really great in the Sunday School lesson and I think the sermon came together well.  After Church, they gave us a pastor’s appreciation gift.  I think one of the things that we really love about this congregation is just how much love and appreciation they show Laurie, Charlotte, and myself. 

At our first Wee Kirk meeting, one of the things that I realized upon entering the room tonight is just how frustrated people are with the denomination.  One person said something like, “wouldn’t it be great to see our denomination really come alive” and the room broke out in laughter.  I think that’s kind of the point we’ve come to… it’s hard for us to be part of the Church sometimes.  There is so much infighting, so much arguing, and so much disagreement and distrust that it’s almost palpable.  We just don’t know where the denomination is going to be in the next five years.  People are scared.  And that fear has killed some of our ability to be able to see the Church as a place where we can experience new life and hope.

I think that the reality is that this is happening all over the Church.  It’s not just the PC(USA), it’s happening in lots of denominations.  We’re afraid of the culture, we’re afraid of what’s happening around us, and we just don’t know how to respond.  We look at the news, and we hear about wars and poverty and hardship.  We see the increase in secularism and sometimes doubt hits us and almost wonder ourselves what it is that we’re doing. 

I feel lead to pray for God’s Church.  I don’t pray that we’ll all agree on everything, because that’s never been the case.  But what I do pray is that we would be so lead by God that we would live out our lives in love and compassion toward one another.  I know that it’s a high ideal, and I’m very new at this whole pastor thing… but I think that we could make huge strides in the ministry if we simply viewed one another the way that Jesus views one another. 

I fail at this every day.  I look at other people’s failures and judge them, yet I show myself grace and mercy.  Yet, just as Paul said, I am chief of all sinners.  I am broken, and I am wounded.  There’s a mewithoutYou verse where Aaron Weiss says “I need more grace than I thought.”  I realize daily that my biggest failing is not a lack of grace but a lack of humility.

I pray that God would humble me this week.  I pray that my God would shine brightly in the midst of all of my hurt and brokenness.  In my darkness, may his light shine.